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What most people don't realize is that a break up with an ex is a type of war game. Psychologically speaking, after a break up you start dealing with an ex in a war of wills and words and attitudes. It's a kind of war that only the most focused and devious player can win. You need to use tricky mind games to get your ex back and win over his less skilled attempts.
First things first. You want to use your actions and attitude to send the message that you feel the break up was the best thing that could have happened. The tricky strategy is to behave like you're ready and willing to use this separation to get your own life in order. And you're fully ok with letting him have plenty of space to do the same. He'll be more than a little shocked to see you behaving like you approve of what he has done.
Stay in the role and be totally cool with it and stay the course. Get yourself into a different routine and make it clear that you are having a ball because you're enjoying your freedom from him.
To crank up the tricky mind games to the next level to get your ex back, you'll want to master the silence treatment. Do not speak to him if at all possible. Spend the bulk of your time with your girlfriends and keep on the go. Don't react if you see him on the street. Just respond as though he's a stranger or someone you hardly know (which is more truth than fiction).
Silence is powerful and is nearly impossible to defend against. You won't want to be obvious by not speaking if you walk into him on the street. It's important to speak and keep moving. However, you definitely don't want to accept invitations to talk over coffee. And dinner invitations are out of the question. If asked, say you're too busy. Then be sure to go out with friends and stay late into the night.
To add even more effective trickery, dress up more often and get a beauty makeover. Lots of stores offer them for free. And nearly everyone has a friend or knows someone selling Mary Kay products. They're always good for a free makeover.
While you're at it, start one of those lose 10 pounds in 10 days type of diets. They work best when you drink an extra gallon of water every day to flush out the excess stuff in your system. You'll end up looking and feeling better than ever and it will be easy to see he's getting weak. He'll not be able to resist falling in love all over again. But you must be strong and make him wait.
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